These days in India

So much has happened these past few days.  We are just trying to soak it all in as we get to know our daughter!  She is so full of life and energy, just waiting until she sees something else new.  I had assumed she would be overwhelmed at it all and retreat to herself, but she is completely the opposite.  She loves playing games with us...and not the intentional Uno kind of game.  She loves the "potty game"--where she pulls up her shirt or dress to tell us she needs to go potty.  Once we have her diaper off, she shakes her head no to tell us she really does not need to go...but then says, "soap!" and points to the sink.  Joshna LOVES to lather her hands with soap--although she now has progressed to lathering her arms and legs too!  She is great at splashing her face with water to clean it (the kids all did this in the orphanage after meals).  Whew, this routine is wearing us out, but Joshna is so excited with it that it is hard to tell her no.  :)  She definitely has a very strong will (yes, another daughter with one!).  She pitches the biggest screaming fits and then looks over to see if we are watching.  She hates it when Chip leaves (in case you did not read, I was the one to give her the lice treatment, so she bonded with him because she was mad at me!).  She will scream and scream until she realizes I am not going to give in and go after him.  She looks at me, gives me a silly pouty look, and then huffs with her breath.  Whew, we are in store for some fun times ahead!

Joshna has loved being on the go and around people.  She waves to everyone when they wave to her, and she likes to blow them kisses.  She even does the "Namaste" bow with prayer hands!  Unfortunately, she attracts many oooos and ahhhs--all in front of Ellie. Finally one of the head managers at the hotel came up to Ellie today and said, "It must be hard having a sister receive so much of the attention."  After I translated his English to her, she just grinned because someone finally understood what she is going through right now.  He then said, "You're cute too!"  We have sure had a huge transition with Ellie this past week.  She is throwing some huge fits, and Joshna justs looks at her as if to say, "What's up with you?"  Yes, as I just finished mentioning, Joshna has had her share of fits too!  I need to remember...that which does not kill us makes us stronger!  (Are you sure???)

Today was another day spent at the doctor's office and US Embassy.  Turns out Joshna does have TB--we were quite scared that the Embassy would not grant her visa, but the doctor did not seemed too concerned.  While we waited for the medical report to be written, we met two other families from the US who are adopting kids from India (also from Chennai).  It is interesting that adopting from India is a very lengthy and difficult process, yet at least three US families are bringing home children at the same time.  Hopefully we will be able to keep in touch with each other (one of the dads in the group actually speaks Tamil--the language spoken in Chennai!).  Thankfully the work at the Embassy went well. The lady who helped us was an Indian who must have grown up in the US.  She spoke with a thick southern accent and kept saying "like".  My favorite sentence she used was, "This is like the most complicated thing!" (speaking of our paperwork).  No kidding!  I just wanted to laugh and tell her she has not even begun to see just how complicated.  And this is someone who works for the US government saying this?  Whew...it really proves we have been through the ringer!

The only problem we encountered today was when that same woman at the Embassy noticed our home study report.  It stated we are agreeable to adopt a child with minor, correctible needs.  The orphanage had checked off many medical conditions they thought might be a potential with Joshna.  Of course, they have no medical training.  They just check off what they think possible.  On the list was a neurological condition that could mean either very mild developmental delays or severe needs with life-long medical treatment.  This woman was so concerned that we would not try to "get out" of our duty to parent this child based on the word "correctible" in our home study, that she wanted to call the orphanage and doctors to look into this more.  I tried to assure her that we have already bonded with Joshna, and as far as we are concerned, we are her parents regardless of what diagnosis lies ahead.  Finally, I teared up and she got the point that I am this child's mother!  That ended that one.  :)

I now know what all of the fuss is over the "monsoon season".  Today it rained for less than an hour, and the roads were a mess!  Water pooled in the dips in the roads and delayed the masses of cars, trucks, buses, and rickshaws.  What would have been a 15-20 minute drive in Nashville took almost an hour here.  It was also a ride in a taxi that was on empty with AC that did not work with 100% humidity and incredibly heat!  I thought we would never make it, but after almost six hours of being away, we returned to the wonderful world of air conditioning!  Chip, Ellie, and I went for a swim in a cold pool while Chip's mom sat with Joshna while she napped.  Upon returning from the pool, Joshna woke up in a great mood.  After snuggling with Chip for a while, she began singing and dancing!  After a while, she started singing "Happy Birthday!"  It was all a bit too much for Ellie, so she and I stayed in the room to eat together while Jackie, Chip, and Joshna went to dinner downstairs in the fancy dining room.  When they returned, Jackie said it was a good thing we didn't go.  Joshna sang and danced, she flirted with all of the men behind the buffet, blew kisses to people-- basically she drew plenty of attention the entire time.  It would have driven Ellie nuts!  Hopefully this phase will quickly move into a more settled phase for the two of them.  In the meantime, we are in for some fun!

Exhaustapated!!!

When I was a kid (12 years old), I had a nightgown that said, "Exhaustapated!"  It was my favorite one to wear each night...I think because it would be the one word I use constantly to sum up my life as a parent!  Whew...I am exhaustapated!  I will try to write a longer blog tomorrow, but we have spent every waking minute trying to run after our little girl...or calm down our big girl when the little girl does something annoying.  It is so wonderful to have them both together--even if it does mean sibling rivalry!  They are sleeping next to each other right now, each with their pillow pet and blankies.  I think I will join them and write tomorrow instead.  Until then....

Joshna's here!!!

Our daughter is with us!  She is precious--what else can I say?  Last night was a bit much for her, so she was full of apprehension at what was happening. Overnight I let myself worry about everything that could possibly go wrong today (Wednesday, July 13th) when we picked her up from Christ Faith Home. Thankfully, God was merciful and helped us all be in good spirits!  It went amazingly well!  (Thank you for all of the prayers for this!)  She was in school when we arrived (all children over three years go to the little kids class where they learn the Roman alphabet.  She was learning her capital and lower case letters!!!  We took her out of class to go upstairs to be with her younger friends who are under the age of three.  It was just in time for lunch (rice and chicken). Joshna let us feed her (she put the spoon in my hand immediately and pointed to her dish--she knew exactly what she wanted me to do!).  After lunch was nap time, so I spent a little time sitting with the house mothers while they ate.  They offered me some food, so I said I would have just a bite to taste it.  Since the women eat by gathering a soupy dish with a ball of rice, one of them made it for me.  I reached out to take it with my hand, but the woman smiled and just lifted my chin and put the food in my mouth for me.  The others all began to laugh.  She did it again before I had a chance to say anything, followed by another woman who put a wonderful beet dish in my mouth.  These were not small wads of food, and I was beginning to become very full. Thankfully they could tell, and they did not offer again.  One of the women said she wanted to come home with us to be our cook (at least that is what I gathered from the very broken English).  The others said we should take her home with us.  It must be very hard for these women to know the young children have the opportunity to go to the US and have a different future.  Because of the caste system it is hard for any of the women in that room to marry and have a family.  They are each others family, as well as any children who remain in the orphanage for an extended time.  Words cannot describe the love I have for them and what they do for these children!  They raised my baby girl during her very crucial formative years.  I am forever grateful!

Since Joshna was napping, we all decided to have a quick rest too.  Josh, the main caretaker of the facilities and women, is a kind man around our age.  His eyes seemed to communicate a very familiar feel, as if we have met before.  His home (or perhaps an apartment for the orphanage) is a few blocks away from the orphanage, so he took us there to lie down on bunk beds.  It was nice to be able to rest while our social worker was out running errands to finalize paperwork for us.

After returning to the orphanage 1 1/2 hours later, we were able to meet with the director (who had been out all day) and ask questions.  We signed a couple of pieces of paper, they brought Joshna to us, she and Ellie were given silver ankle bangles as gifts to remember her, her caretaker (Sarasu) came to say goodbye to her, we had a cup of hot tea, and we were on our way back to the hotel in order to change hotels again! Joshna cried a little saying goodbye, but by the time the car left the orphanage she was just watching everything around her.

Once back to the orphanage, we were able to play together in the room by ourselves before we checked out.  This gave us a great bonding time, and Joshna warmed up to us quickly.  She wanted her sister to play with her, so she would take Ellie's hand and drag her wherever she wanted to go!  It's funny, Joshna is very quick to point to what she wants and shove our hands or arms away when she does not want something.  She is very opinionated, just like her sister!  There are actually so many similarities in them and in our entire family.  It will be an interesting week ahead to see more of her personality come through.  

She, Chip, and Ellie are all snuggled in bed sleeping right now (I have been awake since 3 am).  The one  thing we needed to do before going to bed tonight was to have a lice treatment.  Joshna was not a fan of that and screamed during her bath.  Afterward, she wanted nothing to do with me!  She gave me a mean look and then went to give Chip a huge hug, as if to say, "Ha!  See if I ever hug you again!"  It's funny how children are so universal in their actions!  We then went soon to bed (although Joshna wanted to stay up and play with a light-up ball we had given her...woops!).  She still did not want to go to sleep until Chip returned from his shower and went to sleep with her.  Hopefully some candy bribery will do the trick to help her forget her lice treatment!

I should go, since there in only another 30 minutes or so before she might wake up again. I can't wait to update more later!

Together with Joshna!

 

Today we met our daughter for the first time!!!  She was a bit overwhelmed, as were we, having rushed from the airport to make it in time right before dinner and bedtime.  She is very quiet and reserved. When asked a description of her personality, they immediately described her as "moody!"  Jackie (Chip's mom) immediately responded, "Oh good...she'll fit in with the rest of the family!"  That about sums it up in a nutshell.  We are all exhausted and moody right now (especially in this heat, with no regular meals or sleep), and we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow at the orphanage and as we return to some hotel (the one tonight is fully booked tomorrow). Please pray for rest for all of us and a peaceful transition.  We will update more details later.  Thanks again for all of the kind words of support and the prayers right now!

Tomorrow, tomorrow!

Today we woke up early again (not intentionally).  Chip had a fever, and the rest of us felt run down trying to fight whatever it is that is wearing us out.  By 10 am Chip's fever was gone, and he was feeling like a new person, so we hired a car for the day.  We went to India Gate (very similar to Centennial Park with a playground, ponds with paddlewheel boats, but with a memorial to all who have died in WWI and the Afghan War of 1919 instead of the Parthenon).  It was here that Ellie was bombarded by paparazzi again (this time a father went so far as to put Ellie's arm around his son for the photo!).

From there we went to the Cottage Industries Emporium, a shopping experience full of handicrafts from all over India in one very large (and non-airconditioned) building which is run by the government (i.e.-no haggling!).  We did not make it through the entire facility because anyone who has tried to take a seven year old shopping in extreme heat and humidity knows that you will not make it very far.  Thankfully they do sell cold water!

After that we tried to make it to an enclosed, air conditioned mall for lunch to let Ellie experience a McDonald's in another country for comparison, but the driver became lost again and took us to what seemed like the far end of the earth to a random sari shop at a dead end in a little village.  It would have been nice to find a sari, but we were overcome with heat in a car that did not have much AC and that seemed to possibly break down at any moment (transmission problems).  Since we were not feeling well, we skipped lunch and went back to the B&B.

After resting, everyone else seemed to feel much better--except me.  Unfortunately, I am now officially sick.  While I slept, Chip talked with our Indian social worker.  They arranged details for our trip...we leave tomorrow for Chennai!  After stopping briefly at our hotel to meet up with the social worker, we head straight for the orphanage to meet Joshna for the first time!!!  We will spend a couple of hours there getting to know her.  Then we go back to the hotel for the night and return to the orphanage the next morning (Wednesday).  We fly back to Delhi on Thursday, where we spend time at the US Embassy on Friday, doctors visit for Joshna on Saturday, back to the Embassy on Monday, and home on Tuesday/Wednesday.

It is all happening so much faster than I could have imagined!  I am off to bed again.  We would appreciate more prayers for our health to hold up through this time.  Thanks so much!  We look forward to giving an update tomorrow night!

Our second day in Delhi...

On our second day in Delhi we were all wiped out.  Allergies and pollution are very strong, and we are all fighting off colds.  After breakfast Chip, Ellie and I decided to walk up to the local pool to swim at "The Club" in the gated community where our B&B is located. Guests here are supposed to be able to use the facilities there without problem, but imagine anonymous people walking into "The Club" at home and trying to use those facilities.  We were looked up and down by several sets of people, showing paperwork to prove our stay here, before we even set foot near the pool.  Murphy's Law...as soon as Ellie and Chip were ready to swim, thunder hit.  Thankfully they let you swim regardless of the weather, otherwise we would have had one not happy camper!  It was a very uncomfortable feeling, knowing we did not belong to the exclusive club--we didn't stay long.  (We have been warmly welcomed by everyone else here.)

Walking home from the pool

The walk home from the Club felt like walking home from the pool at the Monteagle Sunday School Assembly (a small community where we grew up going each summer)--many trees, gravel streets, dogs running loose...although they never had Indian women carrying laundry on their heads!  We have loved our stay at the Thikana B&B--wonderful food from "The Club" (delivered, of course!), borrowed movies from the 9 and 6 year old girls in the family who owns the B&B, two dogs (we are missing Jack), homemade baked Indian treats, and plenty of bottled water!

Crowds at the Lotus Temple

After swimming we took a very long nap to help fight off these colds.  It was hard waking up, but we managed and headed out to the Lotus Temple.  It was crowded with so many people, and the heat and humidity was awful!  We had a long walk up to it and a long wait to go inside, but it was worth it.  It is designed for light to reach the inside through the petals of the blossom...a treat to see for an architect and his family!  On the way out, we were stopped by some Indian families who wanted to take photos of their children with Ellie.  Poor thing...she had been a trouper this entire time of sweating and walking and waiting.  Now she was bombarded by the "paparazzi" of India (we knew to expect this, as many people never encounter young fair skinned kids from the US).  She had a glimpse of what it is like to be famous, and she did not like it one bit!

Ellie and the Paparazzi!

Because we weren't feeling well, we headed home to order food from the Club (an entire meal feeding 3-4 people cost only $12).  We watched a family movie together and headed to bed early.  It is now just after 5 in the morning, and Chip woke up with a fever.  Monday will probably be a day at home for rest before we travel to Chennai on Tuesday.  We would appreciate prayer for our bodies to heal and rest in time for Joshna to join the family. Thanks!

In India!

Thanks for all of the prayers.  After a VERY long day of travel, we made it to Delhi and had a few hours of sleep.  The flight was overbooked by 37 people, so we were grateful to have seats--even if that meant sitting in four different sections of the plane...all middle seats!  Thankfully, there was a very nice couple who agreed to change seats to let Chip and Ellie sit next to each other.

We are heading to breakfast at the B&B and for a swim at the local pool a little while later. Sweet dreams! Hopefully we will be able to stay awake all day.  :)